Focus

Focus

Breathe...

"You can do this,"

"What am I doing here?"

"I have no right to be here, do I? 

Ugh, he's back again...

So annoying 

to show up in a place like this.

But I knew he'd find me,

He always does.

It doesn't matter to him

That he ruins this event too.

It is inevitable I guess,

Almost ironic 

How he hunts me down 

When it takes so much 

Energy to leave.

Okay, I might as well

Put on my mask with 

The perfectly coiffed smile

Then no-one will see

That he has found me here.

I feel their eyes

Watching me like wolves

Waiting to devour

What life I have left.

Sucking it from me

Right here in the middle,

As though their breath 

That gives them life

Is sucking mine from me.

It won't take long tonight,

Even though I saved

And I saved to be here.

No, it started before I arrived

And I cannot turn back

Or draw from past reserves.

This is it.

I either push up my chin

And move forward

Or fall into the pit again.

I choose...

To move forward,

To not look him in the eye

Until I absolutely have to.

I know he will make me pay;

For days and days I will pay.

But today, it's worth it